Those were the days
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
CURSED NOSTALGIA II
Those were the days
CURSED NOSTALGIA I
dark red corner
Safely settled, it brought
a few happy memories,
a few sad moments.
Opaque, this corner
My soul’s light,
the soft corner
Monday, October 17, 2011
I WANDER AMONGST WONDERLANDS
Little I am, in my heart of hearts, I believe so. And my mind, it wanders amongst the myriad lands, spanning both dreams and reality. Unlike my grown-up thoughts, my dreams revolve around in the fantasy lands, be it being Alice while in Wonderland or Finding Neverland wherein we didn't have to grow up. I too have dreamt numerous times of trips to those enchanted places, and that's why I still feel rejuvenated seeing those fantasy movies. Amy Adam’s ‘Enchanted’ and Anne Hathaway’s ‘Ella Enchanted’ are also fairytale movies that gave me the same gratification. Sometimes I wonder if a trip to Disneyland can fulfill my dreams or cure me of few horrid nightmares, but each time I end up realizing that it cannot be so. Maybe I should really give my dreams a few wings, fly perhaps to Disneyland and find if its really so. Until then, I must content my heart by penning down whatever I feel.
For a twenty year old damsel from a small town trying to adjust to the demands of the metro lifestyle, while juggling between sincere pursuance of education and love, life's tough. Life in an alien land, where people are more concerned about their looks and clothes rather than their thoughts and emotions, where malls and plastic smiles abound, I feel suffocated. At times like this, my heart reaches out to those beautiful places in the movies I see or books I read while cosying up in my bed and I relish them in reverie.
Ah! Hope I'm not turning into a lunatic. Sometimes I wonder what if I never actually grow up, and this feeling bugs me more when I see my friends engrossed in some good horror or drama movies while I await to see some wonderland. It's not that I don't see or enjoy other kinds, it is just that these kinds of movies which talks of fairy tales and dreamlands makes me feel satiated. At times I get so much into the skin of them that I feel, think dream like the protagonist itself. I always love dreaming of beautiful lands and unreal creatures around me, as if I’m living in a fairytale. For me, even fairytales are real, I know some of you (especially girls) would understand the feeling and agree with me.I know we all want to grow up fast when we're young, but then don't you sometimes reflect upon your childhood memories and yearn to live those fantasies in a wonderland? I do.
What if there is a real neverland or a real wonderland? What if we are yet to explore them?
I wish it really was like that. I would have been the happiest person on earth if I would be the first one to explore them. Even the movie ‘A Little Princess’ made me visit a beautiful dreamland. India, my country has been portrayed like a wonderland for the little girl in the movie. But the depressing fact is, India actually isn’t like that anymore. I wonder if it was so thousands of years ago. But then, I feel so awful when I realize that if it was so I wasn’t born then and I’m born in the twentieth century and that I’ll always have to live in the twenty-first century that ought to make every person practical and not dreamy. I wonder where these dreams of mine would actually lead me. Often, I dream of writing something that would talk of my dreamlands when I have a decent career or rather, wonderlands. But, oftentimes I also end up dreaming that these will lead me to nothing and that I will end up ruining my career because in my prime, I’m actually living in dreams most of the time.
But, without these dreams, I’m never me. I love being a little girl, running around in nightmares and dreams. I don’t care if the world isn’t like me, but I believe, in my heart of hearts that one day, my dreams of being in a wonderland would surely come true. There, in that beautiful land, I would run along with amazing creatures, vivid and dreamy. I would land in a land of pink grasses, yellow trees with green trunks, bluebirds, purple, red, white and orange flowers with pearls as their leaves, castles made of gold, silver and diamonds and the whole world there would be like a smiling rainbow.